Revealed SecretsAuthor: willows_whiten
With another war in progress, one of BJ's secrets comes to the surface.Pairings:
I own nothing, except Kathy and Patrick.Warnings:
The BJ/Carrie storyline rears its ugly head. Hints of make-up sex.Word Count:
“Erin, I’m so worried Patrick is going to cheat on me,” Kathy said.
“Men are never faithful when they go overseas.”
“Not true. My dad was faithful to my mom his whole tour in Korea.”
“Did you ask?”
“No, but I’m sure.”
Erin walked into the house after school.
“How was school?” BJ asked, looking up from his paper. “Erin darling, what’s wrong?”
“Someone at school said something and it bothered me.”
“Care to enlighten me?” BJ asked, patting a spot next to him on the couch.
“I feel awkward asking,” Erin said, sitting beside him. “I know I know the answer, but my friend wanted me to double check.”
“Honey, you can ask me anything.”
“Daddy,” Erin paused to gather courage, “Did you ever cheat on Mom while you were in Korea?”
BJ didn’t say anything, not sure how to answer. Movement in the doorway between the living room and kitchen caught his eye. He looked up and saw Peg. The two looked at each other for a few moments before Peg went back to the kitchen.
“Peg,” he said, following her.
He watched as she used her hands to pound meat together for meatloaf and wondered if she was picturing his face.
“Sweetheart, I’m sorry. You have no idea how sorry. I regretted it from the moment I realized what was going on. If you don’t believe me, you can call Hawkeye. He watched me freak out over it because I felt like such a louse. “
Peg continued to pound the meat, and BJ wondered if she had heard him. He felt a little scared that she wasn’t crying or showing any other emotion.
“I just want to know two things,” Peg said, turning to him. “One, how many times did it happen?”
“Just once. And that was one too many times.”
“And these twelve or so years you’ve been back. . .have I been seeing the genuine you?”
“Yes. I promise. I truly love you Peg. You and Erin are my world.”
“Subject dropped,” Peg said, turning back to the raw meat.
BJ touched Peg’s shoulder then returned to the living room.
“Daddy, I’m sorry,” Erin said.
“Don’t be. I never meant to betray you or your mother. You know how we taught you that doing bad things doesn’t make a person bad?”
“Yeah. Good people make mistakes.”
“Well sometimes faithful people do unfaithful things. If I hadn’t had to be so far from your mom, it never would have happened.”
Although dinner and the rest of the evening went amiably enough, while Peg was in the shower, BJ grabbed his pillow and set up a makeshift bed on the couch. He knew he was being a chicken about the situation, but he wasn’t ready to deal with the pain he would see in Peg’s eyes. As he stared at the window, thinking about how he should be in bed with his wife, not punishing himself for something that happened over a decade ago, he began to cry. BJ buried his face in his pillow, not wanting Peg or Erin to hear. He looked up when he felt someone touching his shoulder. He squinted in the moonlight and saw Peg.
“I’m so sorry,” he said, his voice hoarse with the tears he kept crying.
“Shh, I know,” she said, wiping the tears from his face.
“It didn’t mean anything. I don’t know if that makes things better or worse. I mean, I didn’t use her. For both of us it was just a matter of a warm body in a moment of overwhelming need. I wanted it to be you. The whole time I knew it should have been you. I’d give anything to have that moment erased. I tried so hard to be faithful because I love you so much. I’m not the kind to be tempted. I love you Peg. I hate I did this to you.”
“Shh,” she said again, smoothing his hair and kissing his forehead. “It’s okay.”
“Why are you being so nice?”
“Because,” and she paused. Peg took his hand and kissed it. “Because I know you BJ. Because you’re my husband. I used to tell myself that I would never condone cheating, and if I had a husband who did cheat on me, I would request a divorce and never forgive him. I used to think that once a man cheated he’d never stop. But I honestly believe that you haven’t changed. I honestly believe that you are still the loyal, faithful man I fell in love with. And I don’t think my beliefs are naivety. Anything that makes you this upset years after it happened is more than just remorse of being caught. I believe that you truly do regret it, and that it was just a onetime thing never to happen again. I’m okay with blaming it on the war and leaving it at that. I get that it was hard to go that long. And I do believe you that it never would have happened if we were with each other.” Peg lovingly stroked BJ’s cheek. “I can’t sleep without you. It brings back too many painful memories. I still love you BJ.”
“I love you too.”
“Please come back to bed. I need you.”
BJ smiled before kissing her. He had intended just a quick peck, but wound up deepening the kiss to the point of pulling her on top of him. Peg pulled away.
“Honey,” BJ pleaded.
“I have a better idea. Let’s go back to our bed.”
BJ watched Peg as she walked away. She untied her robe, allowing it to fall from her bare shoulders. She paused, pulling her robe tight around her arms and looked over her shoulder.
“Coming doctor?” she asked, and winked.